Tuesday, June 23, 2009

cry me a river

I’ve been weepy. It’s the end of the school year, I’m scheduled to the edge of my capacity and I’ve gone to bed over-stimulated for the past three weeks. Honestly, I could tell you that I’m emotional and leave it at that. I remember being pregnant and crying at the holiday commercials for coca cola. But I no longer watch TV; no time. I can’t quite get a handle on the why of all the crying... Past emotional pregnancies pale in comparison. I told one child that I had a leaky tear duct. Is there a frequent crying club? I should be an honorary card-carrying member. My sister is enduring a really tricky pregnancy. She’s in my thoughts constantly. I’ve been attending end-of-the-year awards assemblies at multiple schools, and it has taken everything I can muster to keep from sniffling at awards given to children I don’t even know! My husband unknowingly deleted my Segullah essay. I returned to the computer to revise and it was gone. (Sob) He also handed out a punishment to one of our kids. The consequence was appropriate. There was no complaining or appeal for a lighter sentence. But I was the one who cried. The carpet was miraculously cleaned and floors washed by my extremely service-oriented sister. My daughter ran excitedly into the house to greet me after school and I had forgotten to lock the door--the contractor had pulled out rotted floor boards at that entry and wasn’t finished yet. She fell in up to her hip. Much limping ensued, and I was the one crying. If that wasn’t bad enough, it happened again to my poor unsuspecting nephew. Even the skies have been leaking. Three out of every four days in the last month have been rainy. To everything there is a season… It must be my season for weeping. Knowing that seasons come and then pass, I’m alright with the crying for now.


LL said...

sometimes crying just feels good.
my favorite is when my husband hugs me saying "there, there" then pushes me and away and says, "ok that's enough"
Sending a hug to you--"there there".

LL said...

btw. i REALLY hope you aren't crying because you have bad hair!
perhaps Mr. W could offer his arm pits again! :)

ellen said...

I feel like I've got 15 gallons of tears ready to burst out. Any day now they will, I'm sure.

Smilin' sunshine said...

Maybe we should make a club! I live my life like that. I cry

The sun will come out tomorrow(maybe)!

Annie said...

I like the idea of a crying club. I'd come to that!

I've got the end of the school year weepies myself. And it's a big end-of-the-school year at your house! Embrace the weeping season. (It really does feel good to have a good cry or two or ten.)

Jo Jo said...

Hey, you told me you had a cold! No fair pulling that one over me. Your hormones must be raging!

shirlgirl said...

You have a lot on your plate. You also don't know how to say "no, I'm sorry, but I don't have time." It is o.k. to say "no" once in awhile. You just can't be everything for everybody and as a result of trying to be that, you have the weepies and every little thing will encourage more leaky tear ducts. I think I mentioned in one of the blogs that the caretaker has to take care of herself/himself or won't be any good to anyone or to her/him. I know that Becky is on your mind, but she is being cared for. Make time for yourself--lock yourself in the bathroom or in the car, but TAKE CARE OF YOU!!!! You need time out for yourself. The weather certainly doesn't help. Also, Mr. Spouseman has been away on business and leaves you the sole caretaker. Sorry he deleted your essay. You write so well that I am sure it will all come back to you. Just know that we love you and this weepy business will pass. Once everyone is out of school, it will be time to give them jobs to relieve you of your work.

Science Teacher Mommy said...

Good grief; I've felt it coming on all day and now I think I'm really going to break down. I wish I was there to just really have a good cry with you. I'm feeling lonely in a weird never by myself way.

Jane said...

Oh Jenny-- I know what you are feeling, I have been in that season before. This to shall pass I promise.

Lots of hugs from me!
Wish I could sit and have a good cry with you.

Christy said...

It's good to clean out the tear duct's, sort of like cleaning the fridge every once and a while, sort of messy, but beautiful on the inside afterwards!
Love you great lady!