Thursday, March 19, 2009

better call this one 20 questions.

I would like to speak with the engineers who think up and design things like bathroom stalls for women, and headrests in automobiles.

Actually that comment has been banging around for years in my head. Like when I was feeling VERY pregnant, and trying to get into and then out of the bathroom stall at church. Seriously--trying to squeeze between the toilet paper dispenser and the toilet and the door to the stall which swings INward was nothing short of an acrobatic feat.

I've made the comment before, but I think, no scratch that, I'm SURE these things are designed by men, who don't think about the fact that an inward swinging door might inhibit movement when you're jeri-rigging your hips and thighs around a metal box protruding from the wall, and the commode, which takes up most of the floor space in there anyway.

You think this is random? You should be a fly on the wall of the room my thought processes live in. So today I was bopping around being taxi-mom, and I happen to have traded in my very sleek 12 passenger van for a brand-y new Toyota Yaris. Actually, 'traded in' might mislead you. It's more like trading, or van-sharing. Someone needed the large capacity transport-ark, so I gladly complied, and I've been scooting around town in what now feels like a clown car. Have you seen one of these? Humor me.
This here's a shiny angle-distorted showroom picture of what is a much less glamorous little bee bop car that really reminds me of a pregnant roller skate. Don't misinterpret what I'm saying here; I think being taxi mom in this baby is a lot more energy efficient and practical than the big white whale. Especially since I'm usually only transporting one or two passengers, which leaves oh, about nine or ten empty seats that I'm paying good gas money to drag along behind me. But when almost-teenager daughter got in the car this afternoon and said "what's with this seat, anyway?" I burst into uncontrollable fits of belly laughter. Partly because I just needed a good laugh, and there it was. And partly because I can't tell you how many times I've thought about how poorly designed those dumb head rests are in most every vehicle I've ridden in. Not to mention the ergonomics of most passenger seats. Hello. Because have you ever tried to fall asleep in the passenger seat without twelve pillows to prop you up and keep your cheek from being punctured by the door lock?Oh, and I have to show you the dashboard on this baby. Because who puts the driver panel with speedometer, odometer, etc. in the MIDDLE of the dashboard? Isn't that information sort of privvy to the driver? Why share it with the whole back seat, as if you didn't have enough problems with back seat drivers already? Driving with the dashboard way the heck over there just feels a tad bit off. If I had an extra week in my month, I might consider part-timing as a car parts designer, because the ones who are being paid the big bucks are not cutting the mustard in my book. And there's another post for another day. Because who would ever think of 'cutting' mustard?! And anyways, most of us are now just exclusively squirting that stuff. No knives involved. I'm done.

11 comments:

Swimmingmom said...

Oh how funny! You must really appreciate your own vehicle now!!!! I've had similar thoughts lately about the bathroom stalls at church. No kidding- you'd think there would be a little more thought put into these things!!!

Jo Jo said...

Ditto, ditto, ditto.

ellen said...

First of all I'd bet the whole farm that those bathroom stalls are NOT built to code. No how no way. My brother has a 2 door Yaris which is basically like riding around in a tuna can.

Joy said...

I love how you think. You always make me laugh. You help me see thing in a new light.

Becky said...

LAUGHING! This was a great post. I almost (for a split second) bought into you trading in the white whale! :) Good stuff.

nanci said...

Thanks for the laugh today! You have such a great way of expressing yourself. I have to agree with you about both of these things. One suggestion about the bathroom stalls (from one who cleans them for a living....)check them all out, they are NOT all the same size. In my ward I have two out of four that I'll actually use.

shirlgirl said...

And that is why I use the handicap bathroom because I can move around in it. You should see the one at the health club--you have to stand beside the toilet in order to open the door to get out. There are two stalls plus the handicap one--I opt for that one. As for the car--it is UGLY!! I don't even care for the new Toyota Camry design. I prefer my 1998 and hope it keeps running for a long time. It now has 172,500 miles on it. I'll bet you'll be glad to get your biggie back again.

priscilla said...

Jennie, how I love you. Ditto, great post. You are following in the footsteps of the Hutchins being able to express yourself creatively and well...if you did have time, surely you could make some money at least doing a column for a magazine or paper.
You brightened a lot of people's day. mom

Marilyn said...

Is this really what you are driving, last I heard it was a truck. I also heard about the van, quite the story!

Jane said...

You make me laugh!!

I agree too on all that you had to say.

PS did you box show up? Becky said hers came yesteday...maybe there is still hope. :)

ChefTom said...

Jenny, you are funny.